To WRITE and TALK about HUG (abraço in Portuguese) and how to properly hug someone is ridiculously difficult, yet I believe that the articles I wrote for this blog were meant to take us here: we talked about acolhimento, respect, consent and hygiene, four main characteristics that a good and comfortable hug must have, along with the ability of the people who are hugging to listen not only to the words of other people but also to their body. I believe taking forró classes and actively listening to your teacher is for sure the best way to understand how a good hug can change your dance and sensitivity.
How to hug properly
Before asking to hug someone you have to ask for consent: you can either ask with words “Can I hug you?” or with a gesture-usually facing the person with your arms open and a smile on your face works 😉
After that, read the signs that the other is giving you back: did they say yes enthusiastically? Are they getting closer to you? Are they also opening their arms and smiling at you?
I also suggest you use what I call the “Hitch rule”: do 90% of the effort (doesn’t matter if it’s smiling, arms open, going towards the other person asking for a hug, or filling the space between you two) and then let the other person fill the other 10% of the space. This is the best way to show respect to the other person, specifically respect for their space and their needs.
Do you remember that in the first article, I described what is acolhimento? Well, the perfect hug is fulfilled with all of that care and safe space.
[These things apply if you are dealing with an adult, but especially with a child.]
The forró hug ❤
In forró there is absolutely no difference. Actually, the more you hug different people when dancing and the more you feel different bodies, the more you will become a “specialized listener” AND a wonderfully good hugger. Practice is everything.
I believe that the forró hug is one of the most comfortable things in the world, and at this point, I need to remind you that to hug someone cheiros* is so much better!
I’ll leave you with the link to an Instagram reel, watch it till the end, he speaks about abraço:
A big thanks to all of you who took the time to read the articles and to forró events that asked for my collaboration and believed in my work ❤
Hope you enjoyed this time together.
Maria Luisa Candellieri, sex educator and forrozeira.
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